Is Marriage all what it's cracked up to be?
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22/01/2007 10:12:37 AMwell i think the notion of being married is all exaggerated and probably overrated within our Muslim society. i think people fail to understand who they are first and make themselves a whole. they think by finding them the other half...it will 'complete' them or someone to love.
i personally feel that, that it is a dangerous mindset to come into a marriage. love alone isn't enough when it comes to a serious commitment like this. there are pros and cons in being single and being married however if you are ready to be in one for the right reason and knowing wht kinda commitment it takes for a marriage to not only work, but to succeed..then i suppose it is highly preferred (even islamically) rather than staying alone.
if u find a partner, who wants to put 100% into a marraige and have the same vision, attitude as you do (successful marriage) then i feel that it can actually work. marriage is like a garden..it need to be taken care of 24/7. it can either be filled with beautiful flowers or it can be filled with weeds if not attended to.
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24/01/2007 7:13:02 AMmy answer would be: it all depends..
marriage can be all its cracked up to be, or it be CrAckEd period.
and cherish your single years.. hell yes. why wouldn't you? your life as an individual and what you become shapes what your potential in a relationship with another person is. chances are if you enjoy being yourself.. you would enjoy a relationship with someone who appreciates that and has cherished their single life upto that point.
im my experience, a 'really' good marriage is one based on close friendship which lasts even after the initial heart flutters.
so to conclude, enjoy singlehood, make good friends.. and let the rest happen when it will.
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24/01/2007 2:50:29 PMhmmmmmmmmmmm..... thanks for the advice you guys. it was very insightful.
Virus.. you say that a 'really good marriage is based on close friendship',
do you mean that in terms of the period before marriage, or being married itself?
i guess i'm kind of alluding to the point of whether good/close friends can really make a good relationship..
sorry..kind of clueless.
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24/01/2007 3:33:41 PMwell the friendship is a bit suspect if its not as it was pre-marriage. you would expect yourself and your partner to become even better friends post marriage.
and i would have to say, most definitely yes, good/close friends would be able to make a good relationship.. or to put it better.. take an existing relationship (friendship) to another level.. (companionship for life).. i mean.. what would the reasons be for they not being able to?
but that brings you to the common scenario where once a 'friend' its hard to look at them in different light. but thats a topic for another question i daresay :) i'll ask that as a new Q to start a discussion.
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Or should I cherish my single years..
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rookie
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