Q. younger man loves an older woman

You got onto this question quite quickly Mehboob ;)

Im sure everyone will say that age isn't a barrier...it shouldn't be. But an interest of a 50 y/o and a 35 y/o is quite different. And for a guy..i think they will be very much in active mode wanting to do this and that and bunjee jumping..while 50 y/o (like my mum) would like to stay at home with her always learning about islam in preparation for the hereafter. And she was totally different when she was 35y/o. She was the adventurous bunjee jumping type ;).

Very much in love now does not equal to good marriage later on. Love isn't always what you only need coz in a marriage there are many issues that will pop up, to keep the connection and companionship going. i'm not saying it's not possible i'm sure a few have successfully done it. perhaps she is seeing this guy as someone mature, has ability to run the family and is responsible cares for her etc.....but what happens in a few years when she soon discovers that he is actually the opposite? Will she still accept him as a whole and perfect human being without any resentments?

sure she will say yes. There's no guarantee in live. My best advice to her is, chill for another 6 months. The general idea from experts is to get to know your spouse for at least 1yr ( so that you can see all the crappy stuff and the little annoying things) and then decide if that is what she wants to sign up to for her life.

oh this might be related as well. http://www.nasibriyanilounge.c...

look upon our beloved prophet seerah..
Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) married Saidatina Khadijah, who's much older than him.
It certainly shows no age barrier in marrying whom, as long as they keep the relationship 'halal' .

actually to say its somthing impossible but age isn't really a barrier but lf oppsite yes but simply other ppl around u will find it hav to accpent

In my opinion it's alright although on the surface it does sometimes look a bit 'weird'. But age usually doesnt matter much as long as the love and respect is there, together with the necessary preparedness for marriage. (No point have a younger guy who is lazy and not interested in helping put money on the table).

Since we're on this topic, i'd like to express my view whereby i find it perturbing when sometimes (or rather, OFTEN) some people FREAK OUT when we mention 'older woman and younger guy'. But in contrast, people get EXCITED when the topic of 'muslim man has 4 wives'. I mean, Islam allows a muslim man to take in 4 wives; our Prophet did it. But in the history of islam there's ALSO the part about muslim man marrying OLDER woman; again the Prophet is also an example. So isnt it interesting how DIFFERENT people's attitude/response is towards the two (halal) issues????

Hmm but maybe that shld be a new questn altogether huh.....

Asker's comment:

My personal opinion is she should consider accepting his marrage proposal. A spinster and had sacrified taking care aged parents and looking after her siblings until they have their own family, now alone, she deserved to be loved. Throughout our friendshlp, I never heard her complaining of her fate. Whereas the younger man after two failed marriages and disullisioned with life thought god had answer his prayer when he met this admirable woman. Anyway thanks for all the views and opinions, its an eye opener.

@ voeg..there's already a question on the site about the prophet and his more than 4 wives. ;)

link to Q. here:
http://www.nasibriyanilounge.c...

@ Mariah Kari--> Your question seemed to be a hot one. anyway, which answer will you pick as the choosen one?? :D

oh yes and for the rest...you can always vote for your favourite one and chuck in the '-' votes as well ;)

muaahh...

Asker's comment:

Under different circumstances, Sultana's answer has a point there. I agree its best to give another 4 to 6 months to know each better and see whether they are compatible. If I have not met them I would also think that it is rather weird and unacceptable especially in a Muslim community. Anyway, she's wise enough to consult her brothers and sisters and take her time to decide, afterall if they are fated to each other, why think so much.

Submit link: Exploring the older woman/younger man relationship

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Age is just a number....health is essential.

opps sry hav=hard

love happens, let it. =)

i guess one of the main factors with regards to this is the age gap. but it all boils down to how much both are compatible with each other on an emotional level.

i had a few dates who were younger than me but turns out, i couldn't get used to their level of maturity which was unable to keep up with mine so, there.

but if things do go well, why not?
if they're happy with each other, why not? =)

I am also involved with a guy 15 years younger than me . He has also asked me to marry him . We both love each other and get on very well in all aspects . We have the same interests such as hiking , camping , fishing . I dont think my interest in that will change as I get older as I am very fond of natutre and i am very sporty as well . The age difference doesnt bother me , but at times I do wonder how other people see us . I have been told that I do look younger than my 42 and could easilyn go for 32 . But at the end of the day I am not 32 . lol My moral is good luck on finding love regardless of age as long as he has a drivers lisence so that he shouldnt be droppped by his dad or you have to drive him !!

I am in a very similiar situation. I am a 45 year old woman dating a 30 year old man. We have been dating for over 2 years, and I am confronted with the decision if I should or shouldn't marry him. I was married for over 15 years to a man 4 years older then me and it didn't last. I have experienced more life with my 30 year old boyfriend then I ever experienced with my ex. So in the end, age is not the factor. What is important is that you laugh well together, you sleep well together and you play well together. No relationship is perfect every relationship has something that iis negative,so just wieght out what is important to you. Try imagining living your life without him?. If it would hurt too much...then go for it! I am!!

I heard there are alot of positive things to marring a younger man. Just to mention a few; They keep you young. They do not try and control you, and you live longer.

Good luck!

Well you need to look into your own heart and tell your self this one very important thing " THIS IS MY LIFE AND I AM GOING TO LIVE IT MY WAY" Now if that includes saying yes..Then do it. What are you waiting for? Never mind what these folks are saying. Enjoy him and let him do the same for you. Dont let any one stand between this cause if you do that now and let others influance how you love some one then you might as well say NO. Cause in the long run your doing him a favor. But if your a strong woman who is not easily influenced then to HELL WITH EVERY ONE ELES! Do what makes you happy. I'm 29 with some one who is 20 I've never been happier and more in love in my life. We are planning our wedding for 8-29-09. So I hope to read that you will be doing the same very soon. So good luck to you and dont forget True Love is a True Blessing from God!

I have fallen in love with a woman 13 years older than me and we both have never experienced such an amazing bond or love in our lives and out of the mercy and guidance of Allah she has on her own accord accepted Islam however my family will not hear of it because she has been married and has two young children. They think it's wrong and think of the cultural issues and "what the community thinks" instead of my happiness? I am so torn between the love of my true soulmate & the love of family? I am very confused and emotionally drained.

im involved with this young man,i keep telling him to forget me because of our age gap,many people around us say negative things about our case..but once im telling him to forget me, im hurting myself not him.i keep telling myself why age is a big deal in falling in love.why can we just feel free and enjoy the love we felt,i dont want to see him but i kept thinking of him so what will i do??i control my feelings to him as my mind and other people say but my heart is aching.we live in a real world,building a good relationship depends on how can we handle and fight for it despite what other say....our happiness is in our hands