Salam all,
I was born in Singapore but moved overseas to be with my husband. We had to register our marriage overseas for me to get a PR. Now I wish to be married in Singapore under ROM.
My husband and I have akad nikah in a mosque and he also have a certificate of conversion from the mosque and MUIS.
My main problem is my wali (father) have no idea I had to register my marriage overseas.
Does anyone have any idea as to whether he needs to know or the kadi in question has to tell him?
I just want to get married in Singapore and get it over and done with. Just dont want my dad to know that I had to get married overseas first to obtain my PR.
Any reason as to why you wouldn't tell your dad?
Look if something bad is going to come out of telling your dad, then it best not to tell him. I'm sure you can tell the kadi not to tell him.
However i think sometimes we will be quite surprise when we take a chance to trust our parents and tell them in confidence the things we usually won't tell.
They might scold you or say certain things which may not be easy for us to hear, but at the end of the day they have your interest at heart. The only reason they nag or scold is because they are concern about you. IF you have that in mind at the back of your mind each time you speak to them it will make alot of difference.
anywyas..which country was it for your PR?
salem.
some stuff..maybe Allah alreadi kept it hidden for u..why u want to expose it to ur father and make him upset?
Just get the marriage done and registered ur marriage done at ROMM. Follow the proper protocol, things will work out just fine. :)
Marrying in ROMM is to protect you cos u r protected under shariah law.
Salam to all, that has replied... the country is US. My dad is a very religious man. So even if my husband already converted.... my dad will still have problems accepting. He thinks that anyone who is not born a Muslim will never be a true Muslim. But my husband has learn the prayers, fasting ect etc. and performs it even more than me...lol...
The ROMM requested a letter from my husband's original country of birth to state that he is single. We cant because he is married to me. My father will kill me if he ever finds out. My mother approved of the marriage.
Im already 26. My father wants me to stay single for ever if possible. haha...
So it seems a bit leceh... to register my marriage but like ah xuan has said...its to protect me under syariah law..
I dunno if the kadi will accept not to tell my dad that Im already married.... it is like "subahat" and he might not want to do it... im getting a headache just thinking about it..
I told the rest of my family because they are understanding but they all kept my secret for fear of my dad...
but thank you to all who took the time to reply....
I usually pray Istiharah if i get into this sorta situation. If you don't want to pray Istiharah, a normal 2 rakaat prayer will also do.
Leave it to Allah and he will guide you to the best way to deal with any situation. But first of all you must empty your mind and your heart before your prayers and then ask wahtever you need from Him.
Salam Sultana... yes....I believe that right now only Allah can create a path for me. Overseas mosques and Muslim community groups, are usually open to everything. So the Imam over there understood my predicament but he also said pray the 2 rakaat prayer and ask Allah for guidance before I go back to Singapore.
Thank you! for ur advice...
Salaam,
I heard this case quite often about Muslim women(s) who are prevented or resisted from their parents/family from marrying another Muslim even though the person is serious and willing in Islam. Like candy_bear, it is usually the men that have an issue to handle. Between pride and status, it is almost remeniscent of the time of ignorance of pre-Islamic (jahilliyah) where the Arabs have to performfemale infaticide( burying of female babies) just to protect their honour and ego when a female is born.
Sigh...well like Sultana said, we leave it to Allah and pray for the guidance to the straight path.
Thank for accepting my answer, i wasn't expected it . :D
i'm 500 pts away from the next shield!! muaahh. :D :D
Salam all... what Fariz say is very true...
My father is so super strict... he allows me to go overseas to study but he wants me to get married to the man of his choice...
I have no problems with that...
But I know this guy for very long time... he is a very nice man... and he converted readily to Islam... hearing him say the Syahadat.. I almost cry... coz he memorise everything so quickly..
its like Allah open his heart...
I know that maybe I dont need to tell my father but Muslim ROM marriage need to have a Wali... and my father will disown me if he knows that I already nikah without his knowledge in an overseas mosque...
i can only hope that the kadi can keep a secret... coz I know the ROM will require a certificate to prove that my husband is not single from his country of birth..how can he be single? he is married to me.....
ps:Sultana... no problem... I did not realise I have to accept any answers... Im new to this site... but I would gladly accept any other answers that I havent ... anyone else..let me know too...
Thank you all !
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w'salaam
Salaam, Moderator..
The boss... : )
points noted..
Im new... and thank you for welcoming me..
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